To Spank Or Not To Spank?

After watching the Tyra show from last week (I know, I'm late lol) I wanted to pose the question to everyone out there about spanking. Personally, I was never spanked. I know I got my fair share of things thrown at me or had to block some hits but as for formally taken over the knee? Nope. I am a little surprised too since my mom is from deeeeepppp down South. I think she got enough spankings for the both of us.

I could have used some more spankings now that I think about it because I was a headstrong child and hence, a headstrong adult. On the show though, the guest professor brings up an interesting point. People of color do not spank more because its fun or because we are just used to beatings (the slavery reference) but because historically, if we act up we have a high price to pay. I think what he was trying to dance around in a politically correct way was is if you give a white man a reason, he will take you down. Here is the video so you can see for yourself these mothers opinions and there anecdotes.

I agree with points from both sides but I think its important to incorporate explanations and the spanking. You must have the spanking lol. I think talking with children is pointless. As a camp counselor, they just do not listen. They act like they do and I think that they think they listen also. In the end, they end up doing the same dumb stuff. I bet a swift tap on that behind they commit it to memory a little better though.

I do know one thing, affluent White people need to spank their children without a doubt. I went to an all White and mainly Jewish private school. The problems these people had are crazy. Coke, large weed deals, rehab, 3somes posted on the web, destruction of property, etc. What caused all this? I think it was the attitude. They don't have that fear, that "oh god if my mom finds out..." mentality. I am not saying that other races are perfect, but I feel its just a matter of environment when you get older. Bad crowd, bad actions. As far as mentality though, people of color at least know what they can and can't get away with before they have to go get a switch from the yard.

What do you think? To spank or not to spank? Share your experiences and join in the debate!

Improvement Tip of the Week: Learn A Language

Sak pase! This week's self-improvement tip is to start learning a language. Since I already know Spanish pretty well and live in NYC, I decided to learn Haitian Creole. I think it is a really great idea for every American to learn a language. If you look around the globe, there are many people who speak 3 or 4 languages while most Americans only speak English. It's a good thing for job opportunities and widening your horizons.

If you do decide to take on the task, check out Byki. This site offers 74 languages all for free! You know how I love anything for free. I was pleasantly surprised to find a free extensive download of Haitian Creole because most sites just cover the basics i.e. French, Spanish, English, Italian and sometimes Russian. This site has Urdu, Swahili, Tagalog, Portuguese, Zulu, Hindi, Farsi, just the whole nine! They have a deluxe offer that is not free but I see no point. Each language download has hours worth of lessons and free downloads from native speakers on the Byki blog. So far I can make my way from the airport to hotel lol. If anyone wants to join the challenge, let me know how it goes.

I know I usually have video or photo but since its spoken word, I'll give you a little glimspe of what moves me to speak the language. Below is the video of Wyclef performing at the Hope For Haiti Telethon. My best friend is Haitian, and the people who helped me the most in my life are Haitian and some of the kindest people I know are Haitian. This uplifting performance is a symbol of the Haitian spirit that I know will rise up. God Bless. 

Hip Hop The Great

After being on a mini music strike, my ears have awoken! I was switching through the radio a few days ago and I must admit, the only reason I stopped was because I heard, "...I was on Cecil B., Broad St, Master, North Philly, South Philly, 23rd, Tasker". As I NEVER hear anything about Philly or Cecil B. Moore(My street, woop woop!) mentioned on NYC radio, I paused. Then I listened.

I am a now new found fan of Jay Electronica. The song I heard was Exhibit C off the defcon project produced by just blaze. Jay Electronica reminded me so much of Nas flow wise (even though I hate Nas...). Apparently, he worked on some songs with Nas and a few Neo-Soul artists. As much as I am tired of commercial music today, he is refreshing as a semi-underground artist coming to the forefront. His lyrics actually mean something, his samples are sick and it does not hurt that they are pretty soulful. I secretly hope he comes out with an album or at least keeps the singles coming. He even did a song with Bilal! I have a musical crush....

This is what really got me interested in him but I posted this second one because I feel everyone needs a feel good song. There is so much sadness going on today that this song really brought a twinkle to my heart., glitter and all. Enjoy!

V-DAY FOR ALL!

In light of the upcoming holiday of love, lust and heartbreak I decided to make a special post just for all the V-Day fans out there. I do not know who is more excited to the Valentine's themed movie of (what else) "Valentine's Day" than me.

With the star studded cast of Jessica Biel, Jessia Alba, Taylor Swift, Jennifer Garner, Jamie Foxx, Ashton Kutcher, Queen Latifah, George Lopez, Anne Hathaway, Topher Grace, Julia Roberts...OMG the list keeps going!...this is sure to be a great movie. I usually hate heart felt movies and chick flicks but I really want to see this. The lovely actresses in the movie have some great V-day fashion tips on and off screen that we all can use for that special day to impress that special someone. Enjoy!

Animal Prints With A Twist

Albert L. Ortega / PR Photos

While some people steer clear of bold animal prints such as leopard print, experimenting with bright colors and subtle detail is a great way to try something new. Jessica Alba creates a great look in this peacock design. Other animal prints and details with accented colors work great.

Product Info: 1. Purple Spotted Knit Dress w/ belt, Forever21.com, $19.80 2. White Eye of the Tiger Strapless Dress, Lulus.com, $45.00 3. Green LaBelle Jungle Print Dress, 15dollarstore.com, $15.00


Girly Meets Sassy

Jennifer Garner pulls off this bad girl look with a sweet lace addition. Coupling a touch of ladylike grace with lace and sex kitten leather is the way to go this season. Its cute, its funky and its sweet. What can be better!    

 
  
















Product Info: 1. Shiny Peach/Black Floral Lace Print Nylon Tricot 3/4 Sleeve Dress, AmericanApparel.net, $45.00 2.Slinky Lace Top Dress, Forever21.com, $19.80

On a lesser traveled path...

Once again I am considering going natural. I’ve only intentionally tried once to go natural but that failed miserably after I ran out and got a perm when summer was around the corner. The other few times, well I was just too broke to get my hair done.

This time though, I am purposely contemplating. My last perm was about 2 months ago and since then I have just been doing my own thing. I used Dr. Miracle’s grow 2 in 1 shampoo & conditioner, anti-breakage strengthening crème and gro oil (product review coming soon). After being too lazy to constantly oil my hair like 8 times a day per product, I switched to various other companies like Herbal Essence.

I have been pleasantly surprised at my results. My hair does seem to have grown slightly but I feel that is just because styling at home always provides more TLC than a busy stylist. The months of using a hot comb versus a touch up have got me thinking again, should I take that leap? I love my hair semi-natural from my curly fro to textured ponytail. I just hate the effort.

After spending a boring Sunday searching the internet (and partially without electricity because I did not pay the bill) I stumbled upon a really great concept, Co-washing and co-rinsing.

 

The “co” is short for conditioner. My first reaction when I read “wash your hair with conditioner only” was a stank face that had been saved for special stank occasions. After getting over the initial yuck factor, I actually continued to read. Apparently, they make conditioners that strip or cleanse the hair but retaining moisture versus solely conditioning. In the summer these natural sistas suggested “co-washing” weekly or more to keep in the moisture. With all of the working out I do in the summer heat I will definitely give it a try. Who knows, maybe this will lead me back on my natural path.

If anyone co-washes or wants to give it a try with me, let me know. I’d love to hear your method and how it worked out for you. I’m trying to get silky soft hair for everyone!

Beauties of The Week (with such style too!)

With all of the hatred and cattiness between Black women, Spanish women and pretty much all women I want to break the cycle. The celebration of beauty should be shared between women. These photos that speak one thousand words to me are women who I feel exude style and confidence. More importantly, they manage to show inner and outer beauty. 

Remember to sign up or become a fan of the blog so you can stay updated on more beauties of the week! If you feel like you should be featured send me that breathtaking photo ladies!

Ebony W., Washington D.C., Student

"What I love is my ability to always switch my style up.No matter if I'm wearing my hair big and curly or long a straight it just seems like my confidence shines right through and that's what i love."

I love this photo of Ebony because of how she embraces such a standout hairstyle and simple yet colorful outfit. It is not all about the most intricate dresses that leave you gasping for air, but something that compliments what you already have, natural beauty.

DeBreea D., Philadelphia, PA, Student

Ms. DeBreea was a little too shy to comment ( how humble!) but stilll graciously let me use her photo for the blog. DeBreea has the prettiest photos and most versatile style. Finding one that instantly drew me was hard because they all drew me in! Here she instantly reminded me of a character from For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When The Rainbow is Enuf by Ntozake Shange. She has that concrete jungle background with such urban beauty with pride that shines through. The soul a black woman has been captured perfectly in this photo.

How Times Change

Whatever happened to style and grace? I just recently saw a photo and commercial of Phylicia Rashad and her new slender frame. For those of you who do not know, Phylicia Rashad is most famously known for playing Clair Huxtable on the Cosby Show. Apparently she got fat and with Jenny Craig lost over 30 pounds. At the age of 60 plus, she was fine compared to most but she looks so fab now.

 

The lovely Ms. Rashad before and after her 35 lb. transformation

What I began to wonder was what ever happened to style and grace? In celebrity culture nowadays all you see is platinum hair and skimpy outfits many times paired with outrageous behavior. While I adore the celeb gossip as much as the next person, we sure let our celebrity standards drop over the years.

There was a time when people like Ms. Rashad and Angela Bassett were the norm. A woman of style, grace, class and a sense of style to go along with it. Now the most classy person we have is Beyonce (No diss!). She’s a pretty girl with hot fashion sense but just no personality in any interviews. She’s got the looks and voice but missing the whole package with that monotone speaking voice.

Well something had to make up for the less than average interview skills...

When did the Lil’ Kim’s and Kim Kardashian’s take over? I miss me some Lynn Whitefield, Nia Long, Queen Latifah and Sheryl Lee Ralph. They possess such a refined look that the makeup and hair only enhances their outer beauty not make up for lackluster inner beauty.

We have a few ladies of our day though who seem to embody the characteristics a little though. Jada Pinkett-Smith, Sanaa Lathan and Thandie Newton have all been sophisticated females in many roles and on the red carpets.

Am I wrong to want the classy sophisticated ladies back or am I just an old spirit in a young body?

 True Ladies Lynn & Nia